having a moment

I am really missing Katieann and Kayle, right now. I am missing our time we had together in Redding. Cherishing those moments but its also sad knowing that we will never be that again, what it was in that time. I am glad that we are all doing well in our lives but I miss our friendship. I just miss having people that close to me, who know me that well. I miss you guys. I miss just being me and being loved for it. Not that I dont have that now, but what I had with them I have never had since. how do you get it with others? I dont know. The intimate friendship, I miss it and.....(drifting into thought) I have no words for it, I just miss it. I miss my best freinds. there have been few that I have felt that with but it didnt get that far b/c of fear. I hate fear! I guess fear controlled us getting to close, oh well! I love memories, even if they make me kinda sad. I miss laughing so hard that I cry, because my best friends are freakin hilarious, I miss doing dumb things with them, I miss smoking cloves with them, I miss playing pranks on people with them, getting in trouble with them, getting in even worse trouble with them, seeing bill grubbs in his red underwear, well I dont miss that, but that was really funny. I miss taking road trips with them. I miss them so much. MY heart has such a speacial place for you guys, no one will or could ever take your place. I LOVE YOU!