weak

well yesterday, my car was packed and my tank was full, and I dedcided to move to Mexico. So on I went to mexico, as I drive I see this picture of satan laughing and it pissed me off so badly, that I stopped my car and yelled as long and as loud as I could. I almost passed out b/c all my strength and energy came out in it. I HATE HIM, IN SPITE OF HIM I WILL STAY. All though I feel as if I have no other reason to stay but to just b/c he wants me to run. It feels as if all is falling apart around me and all I can do is stand and say that my God is good, I believe that with all that is in me. "you are good, you are good and your love endures, you are good, you are good, and your loves endures today" that is all I can say. That is all I know how to say right now. I feel so weak, and poor, and needy for such a miracle in my life. The only thing I can believe is that He will show Himself, I hope that He shows himself....things I have thought, what have I done? Papa show me I repent for anything that I have done, any decisions I made that werent from you, Im sorry please forgive me. Im trying to be a better person, friend, character, what is it? Just tell me and I will work on it, how do I make this better, Im not sure there is anyhting that I can do. Jesus Im sorry....whatever it is, Im sorry!