in the world or of it?
to all the people that feel unloved. ...
for the last three years, that have been the most intense,.. i had gotten this revelation that i was daughter, right? that i didnt have to work for love, perform on any level. i got the revelation of grace on some level in the church, as much as you can get it. i was finding out who i am. and to walk that out in the church was easy for me, i kept myself safe and around circumstances that wouldnt challenge what i was learning or getting a revelation on, grace that is.i surrounded myself around people who were like me, all believers. i got it that i was saved by grace and that the only reason for my exsistence is for God to love me. it is all about the relationship that you have with Him. that it doesnt have anything to do with how much i love Him, how great i am, how much i read my bible, how much time i spend with him. none of those things matter, just that He loves me and that is it. that if i never do any of these things, He will love me as much right now as He is ever going to love me. in the church, that was easy to walk out. but now, i am back from africa, working in an enviroment that is full of the world. what i have been learning the last 3 years is being put to the test. i am being challeneged in my very revelations of grace, and love. the questions that have bombarded my mind, heart and soul. the last 2 months have probably been the hardest 2 months of my life, in my walk with Holy Spirit. He has seemed far and close all at the same time leaving me confused and disillusioned. here i am before men, loving Jesus and having to trust that He loves me no matter how many mistakes i am making. so in the church grace exsist....but does it exsist in the world? well for so long it hasnt, that is why the world doesnt come to church. what we have learned that we are sons and daughters has stayed inside the four walls never leaving the "sanctified" but in reality the world are the ones that need to know that they are loved, that there is grace, and it doesnt just start when you get saved, but it is always there. there is no boundaries of grace it knows no bounds. i like living in the world. some of the people that i work with are in the world and they are becoming my greatest friends. i think that when we as believers step outside the four walls with our revelation of grace and love, and allowing ourselves to make mistakes, the world will see something that is pure and holy. that weakness is actually what is pure and holy, because it makes Him strong. david knew that, and his heart was pure before the Lord, and he was totally messed up. they will see that it isnt about having it all together and that i have to be perfect before i go to church and live my life a certain way. they will see that they can love themselves just the way they are because Jesus does and that is attractive. Love is attractive. Grace is attractive. i learned to love myself in the church and now i am learning to love myself in the world. this week something has changed, im not sure what it was, but something has. the very thing that you are called to, the enemy wants to distort. i am called to love the world, i love doing it. i love that my friends are unbelievers and i get to truly love them with a love that is from the Father, and that they are experiencing Jesus and not even realizing it. and im not in it to change them, im just in it to love them. i think that is how Jesus is with us, He isnt in this to change us, He is just in to love us. do we change in the process, well of course...but his motive is to just love us. that is powerful and crazy to think about. He just wants to love us. no matter where you are in life. i know that my life is called to live in the world, the enemy tried to distort that in the last 2 months but, Holy Spirit is so much stronger than that. im so glad that Holy Spirit is my friend. i love Him and He loves me. im just in the beginning of my walk with Holy Spirit and learning His ways, i want to know more. although, it is rocking me to the core of who i am and showing me what i am made of....which isnt much, i like it. because i am getting to know Him and that is my only goal in life. to know Him. and the only way i get to see Him in my life is to stay weak. that is when He shows up, that is when i get to know Him.
for the last three years, that have been the most intense,.. i had gotten this revelation that i was daughter, right? that i didnt have to work for love, perform on any level. i got the revelation of grace on some level in the church, as much as you can get it. i was finding out who i am. and to walk that out in the church was easy for me, i kept myself safe and around circumstances that wouldnt challenge what i was learning or getting a revelation on, grace that is.i surrounded myself around people who were like me, all believers. i got it that i was saved by grace and that the only reason for my exsistence is for God to love me. it is all about the relationship that you have with Him. that it doesnt have anything to do with how much i love Him, how great i am, how much i read my bible, how much time i spend with him. none of those things matter, just that He loves me and that is it. that if i never do any of these things, He will love me as much right now as He is ever going to love me. in the church, that was easy to walk out. but now, i am back from africa, working in an enviroment that is full of the world. what i have been learning the last 3 years is being put to the test. i am being challeneged in my very revelations of grace, and love. the questions that have bombarded my mind, heart and soul. the last 2 months have probably been the hardest 2 months of my life, in my walk with Holy Spirit. He has seemed far and close all at the same time leaving me confused and disillusioned. here i am before men, loving Jesus and having to trust that He loves me no matter how many mistakes i am making. so in the church grace exsist....but does it exsist in the world? well for so long it hasnt, that is why the world doesnt come to church. what we have learned that we are sons and daughters has stayed inside the four walls never leaving the "sanctified" but in reality the world are the ones that need to know that they are loved, that there is grace, and it doesnt just start when you get saved, but it is always there. there is no boundaries of grace it knows no bounds. i like living in the world. some of the people that i work with are in the world and they are becoming my greatest friends. i think that when we as believers step outside the four walls with our revelation of grace and love, and allowing ourselves to make mistakes, the world will see something that is pure and holy. that weakness is actually what is pure and holy, because it makes Him strong. david knew that, and his heart was pure before the Lord, and he was totally messed up. they will see that it isnt about having it all together and that i have to be perfect before i go to church and live my life a certain way. they will see that they can love themselves just the way they are because Jesus does and that is attractive. Love is attractive. Grace is attractive. i learned to love myself in the church and now i am learning to love myself in the world. this week something has changed, im not sure what it was, but something has. the very thing that you are called to, the enemy wants to distort. i am called to love the world, i love doing it. i love that my friends are unbelievers and i get to truly love them with a love that is from the Father, and that they are experiencing Jesus and not even realizing it. and im not in it to change them, im just in it to love them. i think that is how Jesus is with us, He isnt in this to change us, He is just in to love us. do we change in the process, well of course...but his motive is to just love us. that is powerful and crazy to think about. He just wants to love us. no matter where you are in life. i know that my life is called to live in the world, the enemy tried to distort that in the last 2 months but, Holy Spirit is so much stronger than that. im so glad that Holy Spirit is my friend. i love Him and He loves me. im just in the beginning of my walk with Holy Spirit and learning His ways, i want to know more. although, it is rocking me to the core of who i am and showing me what i am made of....which isnt much, i like it. because i am getting to know Him and that is my only goal in life. to know Him. and the only way i get to see Him in my life is to stay weak. that is when He shows up, that is when i get to know Him.
posted by priscilla at 1:20 PM
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