i see the water all around me. there is nothing else in sight. front to back, side to side..all there is water, ocean. and i hear Him asking me to take another step. "Priscilla just take another step?" my reply " Jesus, i dont see a step, all there is water, what are you talking about, if i take another step i will fall, sink, die... there is nothing around me" Jesus: "Cmon, i believe in you, even if you dont believe in me, i believe in you, you can do this" and as i took another step a concrete step appeared, and as i looked back there i saw all my steps that had been set in concrete. each step i took as i took it a concrete plank was created.
i have to give it all to Him. this time i have no plan B. im giving over my heart, my hope, dream, desire ...i cant keep it anymore. it was never mine in the first place. ive held on to it tight, but He is asking me to let it go, not even hold it loosely, but completely give it over to Him. He wants it now. this is hard. i have nothing left. im moving once again, and im scared. i have nothing that im going out there with. but i know this is what He wants, and bc of that, i want it to. but that doesnt mean that im not scared. i freakin freaked right out. but He told me something...
"Priscilla fear and faith go hand in hand, it is just a matter of what you are going to follow. it is easy to believe when you have nothing to loose, but when you have something at stake, to risk, and you still choose to keep walking ,moving forward even when you are scared. that is faith."
Abraham, and Sarah...with Issac. that is faith. they were scared, hell yeh they were scared who wouldnt be, to believe or hope that this promise is going to happen even though i cant see it. i just know that this what im suppose to do. i hope that i dont fail, i hope im hearing right, i hope this is right.
im leaving it all in His hands, im letting go.