Reality

I didnt leave, I just had felt like I was suppose to fast the internet and tv. WOW, was that hard, the internet at least. When I started it I was so excited, thinking, this is gonna be amazing, Im gonna have some major God encounters, going to heaven into different rooms, seeing angels manifest physically, Jesus appearing before me in the throne room, yeah all that was going thru my head! what was this about to look like? I just knew that some life altering, and some huge manifestation was gonna happen, I have been so desperate and hungry for Him, He has to show up right? Well yeah but never how we think. A few days into the fast, I realized how much more I really loved and hated silence. I realized how much time I wasted on the internet and how much time I really had on my hands to really change even to a greater degree the atmosphere and people around me. So I asked Papa what was this for? And you know what He said, it wasnt to give me any heavy reavies, no great revelation to change my life and nothing huge and excentric like myself, but something simple and not complex. He said I just wanted to be with you! And that was it, He just wanted to be with me. In the silence of thoughts and songs in my head, He just wanted to be with me and know that every moment of silence with Him was for Him. He just wanted to enjoy looking at me, and listening to my thought process which can sometimes be scary as we all know. It actually caused me to think about things I didnt want to, but couldnt escape from b/c there was nowhere to go. I had to endure the journey of my thoughts and heart and dig even deeper to know myself even a little better than before. So what has this fast done for me? It has brought me closer to myself and to God. And here is the great thing about it, I did have revelation, it was just different than I expected. I have been hounded about how I think I am great or amazing or beautiful. But Papa told me that I was in the right mindset. In the word it says that we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. We can not love others until we truly love ourselves, not in a pompous arrogant way but in a true God form of loving ourselves, and we can ony do that when we know the truth of how Papa loves us, we can only love as much as we know we are loved and we can only love people as much as we love ourselves, I guess that is why I love people so much. Cause I love myself alot. I do think I am pretty amazing. God is wonderfully awesome. He is so good and is so faithful and He doesnt know how to be anything other than what He is and that is GOOD! And FAITHFUL! All the time. I am still so hungry for Him and want so much more. Can I handle it, when I breathe Him in this time , will I breathe deeper than before? Can I even breathe that deep, and when I dig deeper will I find Him there? Will I find myself there, or what will I find? I dont know but I am willing to find out, I am willing to take the chance and risk it just to have a bit more, just to have another taste of His goodness, will it feel like this forever? I often think to myself that this pain I feel of wanting more, I hope that it gets satisfied but at the same time I hope it never does. I hope I am always even more hungry than the time before, more desperate than the time before when I got full. Im always wanting to be full and hoping I never am. I know it seems contradicting but if you think about it, it isnt.

My prayer: God make me ever so desperate and hungry to be full, doing what ever it takes to get there, but never being satisfied, never being filled. I just want more....


And as I come into this place
May all around me be erased
And I focus on your ways
May I lose myself in your embrace.

I need you more
More than words can say
I need to see your face.
I need you more
More than words can say
I need to see your face.


I sit here listening to this song over and over knowing that my hunger grows and grows everytime I hear it...

I need you more, more than words can say

I cant go any futher until I have more, I cant take another breath until I have more. I am on my face soaking the floor beneathe me with tears of wanting more, just more, more, more...

NO COMMENTS WHAT THE HELL?

Ok that is messed up, I wrote that I had a boyfriend and not one comment, what do I have to do to get some support here, to get someone to comment on my freakin page. AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!! That's just wrong! Do you love me? Did you care that I had a boyfriend for a whole day and not one of you knew anything about it, huh huh did you , did you? Wow, I know that this reaction is delayed but usually I have delayed reactions, I am sometimes a little slow. But still I have a really good point. No one even responded except Stephanie, at least she was wanting to be in the know, uuuuhhhhhh, and I still just love the heck out all of you, Now that is sick....I still love you....uuuuggghhhh.

I do think I am funny.

Wish me luck

Well I wish I was kidding this time but I am not. I really did get my hair cut and I am not very fond of it. When it was wet yesterday in the chair I liked, but then she dried it and styled it, I didnt. I felt like I was definetly in the south with a southern hair cut. I was going for the look of Charlize Theron. But it did not turn out that way. So I am going to have to go back and get it cut shorter, or something, more layers, something! Jesus help me. Hopefully when I style it today it will look different. I hope so, b/c right now I was wishing I had my long hair. It was so pretty, well lets look at the bright side of things at least when it grows out it will be healthy, no more dead ends. So I also need to color it, lets go for a whole new look. I just hope that it turns out ok. I am little nervous, I have never had a bad experience with getting my hair cut before, but I just dont like it. It is way to southern, I like more of a hip look, not classic southern bell. o, well I guess that is what my spontaniety gets me, I just called on a whim. Well wish me luck....

ok ok I was kidding

So first and foremost...what happened tonight....

I was at a show and I have a running joke with a guy named Causer that we are together thru myspace. Well Lauren had to stay the night over there last night b/c it pretend snowed. And the roads were bad. So lauren slept in Jons bed and Jon slept on the couch. She said that Jon was in a bad mood b/c he didnt get much sleep b/c he slept on the couch, and I said o, he could have slept with Causer, but that wouldnt have worked b/c then I would have had to scoot over, and lauren says....

I thought I heard screaming, I mean someone being loud, I mean, I mean.....aaaaaahhhhhhhh that wasnt what I meant!

It was funny and deserves to go in the quotes page Kayle and Katieann.

Ok peoples obviously I dont have a boyfriend. Trust me you wouldnt find out through blogspot. I was kidding, I didnt think you would really believe me. So you will at least get a phone call, none of this writing it on a blog. Love ya though. I was laughing my ass off when I was writing it, I do think I am pretty funny. Tonight, I was laughing at everything I said, I was my biggest fan. It was great.

Alright peoples love ya much and if great news occurs you will know.

GREAT NEWS

It is snowing outside and it is ugly. I hate cold weather! With a passion. I would much rather be hot than cold.

Ok Ok...peoples....GUESS WHAT?????


I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!!! Yes, I know this is a bit sudden especially since I have been like I am not interested in anything right now but it just happened, we hae been hanging out and becoming friends and we just like each other. He is funny and thinks I am great. I love it. So I just thought I would shout it from the roof freakin tops.....my yelling


SOMEONE LIKES ME...NNANANANNAAAAANNNAAA BOO BOO..... SOMEONE THINKS I AM GREAT. AND HOT AND WANTS ME AND THINKS IM FUNNY

I HAVE A BOYFRIEND...I CAN KISS SOMEONE......HAHAHHAHAHAHA

me

The last couple of days have been wierd, I have some strange dreams. I have had random people call me, and I have been dancing my ass off at work, well that isnt wierd, Listening to a lil bit of MJ, you know I have been busting it out, especially since I have had to wear lingerie like clothes, I have been an interesting sight to see. We had some new stuff come out and it was called lingerie, so we had to wear clothes that resembled that. It was great, I have had so much fun. I love my job, and the people that I work with. Tonight I prayed for the guy that works with me and he got healed, then I prayed for the girl I worked with tonight and gave her a prophetic word and she started crying it was awesome. Then another girl came in and she was going to have to have surgery on her eye b/c a growth appeared on it, I prayed for it and it started to go down. That was cool. I love praying for people and giving them a lil goodness of God's love, it is such a privledge, I love it.



Have I ever old you that I love who I am, yes, I need to improve who doesnt? But I geninuely like who I am. I like who God is creating me to be.

I hate when I have to eat my words and actions. Like when I say something to the effect of, I will never like, or never, or that isnt I am sure of it, or I hate conferences I am not going...etc....you get what I am saying! And then I realize that I do, or I am asked to go and it is good. And then you have to admit that you were wrong. And I am fine with admitting that I am wrong but I am finding out that others arent. And I guess I am not always fine with admitting things Ive just confessed to never doing or not liking, what is that called? O, yes pride! hhhhmmmm I have a few people in mind!


This is such a random blog, last night I had some great things to write about but I have forgotten them now, o well I guess it wasnt that important. I know this perfume is older but it is my new favorite, I love it, it is Angel...mmmmmm....it is so yummy! I know if I smelled me I would want me.......mmmmm good!

I am crazy in love with Jesus! I just love Him, that is it, I just love Him! I love thinking of Him, you know that is one of my favorite things...thinking of Jesus! It always brings a smile to my face.

I told Jesus yesterday that I wanted to laugh so hard that I was crying and it became silent and I couldnt breathe. But it didnt happen, I did laugh, I do everyday, but I wanted to laugh so hard that tears were streaming down my face and go into silent mode. I love those kinds of laughs, they are also my favorites. I love being happy and carrying the spirit of joy with me wherever I go. I like that it is contagious. I like being contagious....my feet smell really bad right now...eeeeewwww.....well on that note I will go wash them, that is nasty, I dont know how that happened. They havent been sweaty, that is gross.

other smells I enjoy, i dont enjoy the smell of bad feet, but I do enjoy the smell of:

skunks..I know that is gross but I like it hahahahhaa...I am laughing my ass off at the thought of you all reading this with a look of disgust.
angel perfume
brownies
cookies baking
garlic breath...hahaha I actually really dont think it smells that bad
freshly squeezed fruit
skins of a fruit
chocolate
warm vanilla candles
cinnamon candles
warm vanilla cinnamon candles
cinnamon vanilla candles
clean house
house full of lit candles
any kind of liquor....o that doesnt smell...I just like to drink any type of liquor......hahahha kidding
downy dryer sheets (vanilla lavendar) mmmmm makes my clothes smell great
last but not least........I like the smell of me, I always smell good!

having a moment

I am really missing Katieann and Kayle, right now. I am missing our time we had together in Redding. Cherishing those moments but its also sad knowing that we will never be that again, what it was in that time. I am glad that we are all doing well in our lives but I miss our friendship. I just miss having people that close to me, who know me that well. I miss you guys. I miss just being me and being loved for it. Not that I dont have that now, but what I had with them I have never had since. how do you get it with others? I dont know. The intimate friendship, I miss it and.....(drifting into thought) I have no words for it, I just miss it. I miss my best freinds. there have been few that I have felt that with but it didnt get that far b/c of fear. I hate fear! I guess fear controlled us getting to close, oh well! I love memories, even if they make me kinda sad. I miss laughing so hard that I cry, because my best friends are freakin hilarious, I miss doing dumb things with them, I miss smoking cloves with them, I miss playing pranks on people with them, getting in trouble with them, getting in even worse trouble with them, seeing bill grubbs in his red underwear, well I dont miss that, but that was really funny. I miss taking road trips with them. I miss them so much. MY heart has such a speacial place for you guys, no one will or could ever take your place. I LOVE YOU!

Life is teaching

" Life has taught me that love does not consist of gazing at each other but looking in the same direction"

I found this quote and it is so good, I believe that, and I like it. Life does teach you that about love. Dont you love, love? Isnt it the most beautiful thing, someone gave me the biggest compliment the other day. they said " Priscilla you love people so well, can you teach us how to?" I was so stunned! really even now, but I was honored and tearful b/c that is the very thing I want my life to look like. I dedicate my life to that, my thoughts, medidtating on it day and night, living it to the best of my ability. I want to smell and look and taste like LOVE, if I do, then I will look like JESUS. then I will look like PAPA, like DADDY. then my bestest friend would have rubbed off on me, I will look like Him, HOLY SPIRIT! I love them, so much. I am so glad that HS is my bestest friend or I would be all alone in this great small world. I need HIM so bad. I miss HIM when we can not talk.


every minute without you seems like eternity
every moment with you is to short in time
the thought of it, I cant breathe
the thought of it, I cant breathe
this love it goes so deep
this love it goes so deep

I give you my heart, here it is all of it
take it away, Im carried away with your love
here is my life, my sacrafice
my heart, dreams, desire
I want more love
I want to burn with the fire


that is truly my hearts song to Jesus!

I want more......intimate sweet LOVE!

amazing

Today was a day of discovering, but I guess everyday is that. Since the holidays have hit I have been eating horrible and are starting to fill the consequences of it. So I am starting tomorrow eat all raw again except for salmon, that will be cooked unless it is sushi. So I am going hard core, I cant take it anymore, my body and face is freakin out on me. Being healthy is so important and the last few months I have put it on the back burner. But now it is going on the front on Hi.


Well I prayed for this guy on saturday and he got completely healed. He had surgery on his rotaters cuff and when I put my hand on his shoulder it bulged out and then back again, and then all the pain was gone and the guy was shocked and his face turned pale like he had just seen a ghost, it was awesome. I loved it, I also prayed for like two other people at the book store and at the movies, God was on a role and I was with Him it was great. So I was asked to start leading teams on outreach, just the way I do it, simple and fun. It is all about what holy spirit is saying, go to the movies, go read a book inthe park, go get coffee, play pool, go to a pub, do whatever He is saying and wait for Him to show up and do His thing, which we really dont have to wait b/c He goes everywhere with us. I am also going to Nova Scotia in April and get to share my heart with a youth camp and that is cool. Life is good but that is a given b/c I am amazing because my Daddy says so. And if I am amazing then how could my life not be, I am the most loved person there is. I am His FAVORITE! hahahahahahahahaaa mmmmmwwwwwwwaaaaaaaa!

everything is not what it seems

I am learning so much about the wooing of God, the wooing of love. It doesnt look like what we think it looks like. It is really simple, it is about desire and when we fulfill that desire we walk away with even a greater desire then what we started with. It isnt this feeling of butterflies and cant breathe feeling, a feeling of magic, or sparks flying and although sometimes we will feel that, that isnt what lasts. When I wake with the desire to be with Jesus, my sweet Jesus, to talk to Holy Spirit and just be with Him, to sit on Papas lap, and when I follow through with that desire and it is filled and walk away realizing that I want more, that is the art of being wooed, when you dont even know it. Think about it when you are being wooed by anything or anyone, there isnt a full recognition that, that is what's happeneing it isnt until after the fact that it has already happened. It happens like that in relationships also. Why do make it look like something else, why do we make it look like what we are missing in our lives, what we didnt have as a child or even now as adults, what you didnt feel when all the time that needs to be coming from Papa b/c He is the only one that can fill that anyways. Why do we make it look like our filters. Guess what I am learning that nothing ever is really what it seems. And that isnt a bad thing, but God's idea is so much different than ours. I just want to know what His looks like so I can have the same. I am in such a great place, and I am loving it. But reflecting over this last year has left me with the question "what is it that I am really wanting in a husband?"...... so here it is....someone who values me as his best friend, my opinion although it may be wrong, who likes being around me, someone who has character greater than annointing, someone who could cares less about ministry and more about Love. Is up for anything that Holy Spirit throws at us. Wants our life to be simple but full of adventure, and that I am not the adventure but wants to take me on one. I want someone who thinks I am funny and I can make him laugh but he is also funny. Someone that is laid back and can handle my drama. I want someone who could be a little naughty but chooses not to. I want a man, someone who will call me on my shit, and not be afraid of me. Someone who will step up to the plate and not b/c he is asked but b/c he wants to. I want to be around someone who is fun and it is easy to be with, I can be myself and not have to think twice about it, b/c I know that he likes who I am in silence or me living out loud. Someone who loves to laugh, and can find humor in simple things. I just want to be around me best friend. I know that romance comes and goes, and I just want my best freind. Dont get me wrong I am a woman and want the romance for sure I am a hopeless romantic at heart, but in the end friendship is what you are left with and the most important.

My friend Laura is here from London and we were talking about life and where have all the men gone? Why are all the men afraid to step up and be men? It is our generation of boys who want to stay in never never land and not grow up! We as women are crying out for the boys of our gen. to please be MEN, we need you! We need leaders, we WANT you to lead us, please be confident in who God created you to be, please be who you are so we can be who we are, women!


I just speak to the men of our generation and say " you are Men of honor and respect, who protect and fight and sacrafice. Leaders among leaders, a man who is not controlled by fear of rejection but is lead by the spirit of God and lead by knowing that you are a son and bridegroom of the most high King. You know your identity and walk in it. This is who you are called to be, and who you will walk as. A Man who is determined by the love of his heart and all that is in it and not by the mistakes he has made. Papa, speak to the heart of these men that they would become alive and not be afraid of thier hearts and that the would live there."


Aaron and Kayle I do not include you in that....my discleamor!


Jesus is the love of my life. He will always be I am sure of this, I am so ruined by His presence. I love just sitting with Him. I cant wait until I have a house, what ever room is the biggest will be the soaking room! that I am sure of. My house will be dedicated to hosting His presence.

adventure 2.(re-run)

adventure .2

Ok so our retreat to the woods wasn't as successful as we thought. We decided that we would take some pictures of me so I can be Americas next top model if only in myspace! Which some of them turned out really good! I'll have to post some of them! So on our way out to the woods that is what we did! Stopping, finding really great picture places! And then we deciced to go out to my friend Vanges place which is equally as far but in the other direction! So we go and have some hang time with her and her amazing children! On the way back, we are driving, remember we are out in the middle of nowhere and it is frekin black as black can get! Even with your headlights on it is still frekin black like my ass! just kidding I'm not black only in my heart! Anywho, we're driving, drivin, drivin, and all of a sudden out of frekin no where a guy appears on the side of the road holding what looks like a little girl in his arms on the ground, and another man beside him! Mallory and I gasp with a sigh of fear and wonder did we really just see that! I look at her and say should I turn around? we agree yes we should! We both thought that the little girl was dead! or that we would turn around and go back and they wouldn't be there! we are driving back thinking they were ghost! ya know, it is October(halloween) creepy month, and it is late even creepier, and in the middle of no where, if we died no one would know even creepier! So with all that in mind we turn around and go to see what it was exactly we saw! So on our way we went! We get there and I'm thinking this guy is going to pull a gun out on me and kill us! But we still roll down our window and ask if they are alright and if the little girl is ok? which turned out to be a little boy! Well turns out that thier car had spun out of control and hit a guard rail and went off the side of the hill! So we decided to pray for them and stop the spirit of fear before it had a foot in! So that is what we did! The ambulance finally get there and we leave going out to our retreat! Well we get there already creeped out b/c we both thought they were ghost at first and thinking we are going to see some ghost on the way out to our retreat and at the retreat! Yeah we were freakin ourselves out! But it was fun and then we get there and go to sleep! Not as adventurous as we thought! We woke up early and left for starbucks as our bodies were needing it b/c we didn't sleep very well! And the reason for this....someone followed us out there and freakin scared the shit out of us! they waited until we were asleep and then started to tap on the windows, hearing the sound of footsteps in the leaves, whispers of a mans voice ...saying you get the blonde, the red head is mine! Yeah pissed our pants! So we ended up sleeping with each other in the same bed freaked the heck out , really not sleeping at all, praying in the spirit the whole time! hello we are out in the middle of no where, and someone followed us wanting our bodies
b/c we are so hot! it isn't our fault we are hotties with the bodies! uummm hello! God creating us! Anyways, so here we are safe and with no scars! we had to fight them off with Jesus' name! Thank God He loves us or we would be little tiny pieces of MAllory and Priscilla, never getting to enjoy the true beauty of sex! That would be sad. We would be wolf helpings and vulture dessert! I love Jesus!

2:36 PM

ramblings

What is life about, what adventures are we suppose to have in life? Can anyone answer that question about life? Personally I dont think that they can with a specific answer, there is no text book answer, all it is says is that we are to love. Why does the church try and answer that question like they know what the answer is, or they give some ridiculous answer like "ministry" I hate it with a passion, do you know that I hate "ministry". I could care less about a "ministry", all I want is Jesus, and if that looks like "ministry" then so be it, but it is rare that I have found Him there. I went to a conference last night, and I hate conferences but Papa told me to go, and I left after worship and I had this feeling that I was going to be called out and prophesied over but I left anyways b/c I had all I could take. Well sure enough, This man called me out and started to give me a word and I wasnt even there, so my amazing roommate called me up and was like come back he just called you out and gave you a word. And I came back and it was really good. But he did say one thing that made me tweak, and it was just my personal issue. He said that I would have a ministry yadda yadda yadda....well I dont want a "ministry". I hate "ministry". Why cant we just love and that is what it is about. LOVE! It makes me trigger so bad,why does it look so religious? I know that people have thier stuff but if there is one thing I cant tolerate it is the religious spirit, I have no grace or tolerance for it. I have been asked to do stuff with our church, and I have a feeling that I am suppose to do it, sacrafice and obedience! It wasnt really what I was thinking but I believe God is sneaky. Sometimes He has to trick me, or so it looks that way. I guess I just dont want to get sucked in that tornado of churchy activities and programs and such.....I just dont like it, I really dont think that I will b/c I know that God wont let me and my strong stubbornness of making sure that I wont. Dont get me wrong, I like the church, I just dont like the way it has been thinking. I cant wait until the church gets radical and we redeem its name and place in society. I cant wait, and I dont have to
b/c we are changing it as we think, as a man thinks so he is, huh Kayle? I know that Kayle is on my side. It is changing, it has to, b/c when love walks in it cant stay the same.

naughty, hottie, party...

So I am trying to speak british, or proper english, it is very difficult but luckily I have my friend here to help me out on the proper way to speak like a british person. Words like posh and sacked, and horny and pervie are all words I have heard lots of in the last 36 hours. Im loving it. laura is laughging at me b/c I am constantly asking her to say specific words so I can repeat them just like her, so I can have the perfect british accent. I love my new friend, we get along very well. I am gonna miss her when she leaves 3 weeks from now. Well I will enjoy my time while she is here. Love her, she's awesome, and thinks I am funny. She is funy also, I like her alot.

Dont do it

ok ok...first let me tell all of you that I love you very much, but if anyone gives me another word about getting married I will kill you. I love the place where I am with Jesus and Im not interested unless the guy wants to pursue the heck out of me. So please no more words about dating, married, being in love unless it is with Jesus. I have had so many words in the last 3 months about it all and frankly I am done with it all, I just want Jesus! So if you fee lthe need to give me a word like that, give it to someone else or pray it in, dont tell me though. I dont want to know. Well love you all.

a great day in JAN.

It is so beautiful outside, it is 75 degrees and the wind is blowing. It feels like a perfect day in spring. I am loving it so much. I shouldnt get to use to it though it is Jan, our weather is normally wierd but not this wierd. Im loving it though and cant complain. I have gotten the house ready for our friend that is coming fron London. It will be fun. I am going to go and get some cloves and margarita mix. I have been staying out so late with everyone lately and I love all my new friends that I am making. Im usually not one for big crowds and especially with people I dont know but lately I have really enjoyed meeting new people. I am in such a great place right now, and I love it. I have all these people wanting to set me up with different guys and I really dont want to. I have no desire to be with anyone right now. I know, that is wierd for me, I know that, but it is truth right now, I really dont care about being with anyone except my sweet sweet Jesus! I havent felt that in a really long time. Im loving it. He really is my focus. I cant wait to see what this year will bring, great things I am sure of it. I shouldnt say I dont want to be with anyone, but I am just like whatever, Im looking for it, or waiting on it. Im steady moving, Im keeping on! But my desire right now is just for Jesus! I love Him so much! aaahhhhh the smell of sweetness, I will go now and be with Him...mmmmmm!

last year, this year.

Happy New Year!

The start of a new year is always awesome, we get to start over! All the things that went wrong are over, and all the things that went right we can build on top of! It really is amazing! what an amazing thing to rebuild and build on top of life. to keep building relationships, to keep loving and loving stronger than the year before. No matter what happens you can keep the good and throw out the bad. we really can do that. it is our choice. that is cool.

In the last year I have learned that what ever it is, no matter what, if love is involved it is worth it. even if it doesnt work out the way you wanted it to. I wouldnt change anything about this last year. I have learned more about me and who I want to become more of, it keeps getting better! I love myself more and more as each day passes, maybe that is b/c of the revelation of how much Jesus loves me each day. I have learned that the only fight I have to fight is to believe, to know that GOD is GOOD! And I also learned that it wasnt a fight to believe that, b/c I really know it, I really believe that! God is Good to the core of who He is, and He doesnt know how to be anything other than what He is! to live where I am. to live in the moment of what God is doing NOW! That the moment is always NOW! God is always doing something right NOW, no matter what it is, to the smallest of things to the biggest. Ive learned that small to me is big to God and big to me is small to God! Ive learned that timing is so important, and we can change God's mind. Ive leraned that love is the most powerful thing we can do, it is the prime example of God, the core of who He is, the image we are to conform to. Ive learned that love changes everything, it has to, there is no other option when love is in the equation. Ive learned that family no matter how screwed up is amazing and a gift from God! Ive learned that the enemy cant stop the plans of the Father, only delay, and we can counteract it by believing, by having faith! Ive learned so much and much much more! This past year has been amazing! Nothing turned out the way I thought, it turned out better! I am so glad that God is in control and I am not. Ive learned that when you have gotten to the end, and have done all you know to do and you ask the question "where do you go from here?", and you hear PAPA say " Let God be God" I am learning to Let God Be God! And there is a security you find in that knowing that God will be God and you dont have to do anything! It is very relieving, to know that! Ive learned that resting in Jesus, abiding in Him is my identity, and rest doesnt look like not doing anything, it just means that rest is our identity and that is where we do works of faith, where it comes from is resting in Him, being full! Thanks Papa for an amazing year!


This year I hope to know more Love and walk in it. that love is my identity, my abiding in Him comes from this love affair with Him. I want to be in a love affair that is scandulous with Jesus! I want to be wooed like never before, just me and Jesus! I want to experience His love like I have never in the past. I dont want to be satisfied with where I am, I want more and continually want to want more. I want to really look and smell like Him. I want to go out of my comfort zone, to pour in to people and new relationships, to give away what I already have. I want to love more! I want to know that I am loved more, so I can love more. I want to go to heaven on a regular basis! I want to see more in the spirit, I just want more on all levels! I just want more! there has to be more!